Make Every Word a Gift

Growing up, I remember my family ate dinner in the den watching Walter Cronkite deliver the news every night. We had a set of foldable TV trays and we set up five trays when dinner was ready. While we ate, our visual diet consisted of political unrest, economic updates, tragic events, and many conflicts throughout the world. Our conversation time was limited to commercial breaks; those were mainly opportunities to hear my parents give their personal critiques on the news. Sometimes those critiques would turn into lively debates; more often they turned into arguments. As the youngest child, seldom did I get to share my thoughts.

Our family dinner viewing sparked in me a love for journalism, a special affinity for critical thinking, and a gnawing desire for my opinions to be heard. The relationships I developed over the years tended to be with people who shared my opinions. It was easier. I can remember times when we visited with friends or family and a fiery argument ensued because a simple conversation revealed a disagreement in opinion.“You don’t always need to share what you think,” my husband said. I knew it was true, but I was defiant. You see, not only did I disagree with the person’s opinion, but privately I would make harsh judgments about the person. In my mind, my opinions were right; their opinions were wrong. But why were they profoundly ignorant? How could they be so blind to the facts? What made them selfish and arrogant? These judgments grew into resentments and unknowingly hardened my heart to anyone who didn’t think like me. As a Christian I even put a spiritual twist on it and judged those who disagreed with my opinions as “deceived.” My words and thoughts became critical, unloving, and demeaning. But I felt that it was okay because I always found other Christians to agree with me.

In Ephesians 4:29 the apostle Paul says, “Let no corrupt word proceed out
of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may
impart grace to the hearers.” Paul said our words should build up and
impart grace. James warned believers who did not control their tongue; he
said they were the ones deceived and their beliefs were worthless! (James
1:26) But it was Jesus who pointed out that our words are connected to
our hearts. Jesus said, “But the things that come out of a person’s mouth
come from the heart, and these defile them.” (Matthew 15:18) To change
our words, we must start with our hearts.

In the past few years I have been wrestling with the conviction these
Scriptures provoke. I know that sharing opinions and disagreeing is not
wrong in itself, but the motivation behind my words was not loving. In the
past I tried to justify my sin, and many times I turned a deaf ear to the
Shepherd’s call to repentance. By His wonderful grace, Jesus revealed to
me my sin and gave me grace to make a u-turn. I repented for my words
and the motivation behind them. Most of all, I repented for a heart that was
prideful, unloving, critical, and judgmental.

Jesus responded with a challenge! He actually urged me to take a break
from sharing my opinions and learn how to listen to others instead. He told me to impart grace. Do I still fall short? Of course! But I am discovering joy in listening and learning different perspectives. I no longer desire to be right, but I seek to be righteous when I share. Jesus has challenged me to be motivated by His love and make every word a gift. When I read the words “impart grace,” they seemed to leap from the page into the deepest part of my heart. Oh, how I love the grace God has given me! It is by His grace that I am fully forgiven and accepted in Christ. His amazing grace is the greatest gift of all! What a wonderful privilege to impart grace! Perhaps God wants to challenge all of us at this time. Will you make every word a gift?